and every morning, my heart gets a pang of pain as I run upstairs, and peek through the blinds as I watch him run/walk to the bus stop. 
For the next 7 hours, I have a neverending prayer in my heart as IHe’s my sweet boy.
He’s my girls’ sweet big brother. How lucky they are to have him as their protector.
He made Sawyer breakfast this morning and offered to make Conli hers.
Over the last 2 days, I’ve heard of 2 children who have just received life changing news or had life changing experiences. One being a sweet little boy, the same age as my Max- the son of an awesome couple from our good ‘ol BYU 146th. They just discovered a malignant tumor in his neck. When I read this news, I couldn’t help but to let my mind wander to a place I never want to experience for real. I don’t think I could function if Max was diagnosed with something like that. Or Conli.
I find myself at random times each day, just stuck staring at them w/o them knowing, and I find myself smiling, because I AM BLESSED. Too often I am impatient. Too often I am tired and let myself get angry at them for doing the things kids do. Too often I let the day go by without really spending time WITH them.
Another little boy who I don’t even know, almost drowned the other night. His mommy found him being held up by his loving brother saying, “I’m sorry mommy, I twy to save him.” He’s alive, but no one knows what damage has come to his sweet little brain. In the mom’s blog, she expressed her feeling that it’s all her fault because she left them in the tubby a little too long by themselves. She ran to get something for one of her other precious children and got caught up in “mommy duties” like cleaning up his room and before she knew it, a couple minutes had passed and her little guy was almost lost. I don’t know about anybody else, but I’m guilty of doing things like this EVERY DAY. I say, “I’ll be right back,” to Sawyer when she wants me to sit by her and watch UP for the 496th time and instead, 
I wander in my room, and start folding clothes, or cleaning the kitchen….yes, I understand that it’s all a part of being a mom, but as I was listening to Sawyer’s sweet voice trying to explain something to me last night I thought to myself, “ I need to get this delicious voice on camera more often so I don’t forget it. I need to spend more time loving on her now, because before I know it, she’s going to be 7 like her brother or almost 5 like her sister and it’s going to be different. I need to BE with my kids more often.”
not really doing things with them.
Motherhood is the greatest blessing I have ever been given(along with being Brent’s wife- but that’s a story for another day)!
Brent and I watched Forever Strong last night- it’s a “Utah movie” about a boy that plays rugby that ends up getting himself into some trouble, & gets sent to a boys home where he finds himself because of a coach that cares more about the boy than the team….a bit of the McCheesy going on, but over all, it was a great story and a GREAT message. I want to teach my children to be Champions in life, to live Forever Strong no matter what tries to stand in their way, to teach them that serving others is so much more important than getting their own needs met. That the gospel is true and that if we endure well here, we will receive more blessings and eternal joy than we can ever imagine.
I’m grateful to be a mommy. I know I complain a lot about my “devil children” and their crazy ways, but I wouldn’t trade them for anyone else. They are beautiful, sweet spirits that teach me something every day. 
They are mine, and for this,
I AM GRATEFUL.
So, i added some of my favorite mommy moments in picture below....feel free to look, feel free not to. These are my most precious gifts.....i am blessed beyond......
with Mana at lunch on Christmas break
the girls looking over my notes for conference
playing team rummikub at the cabin- some serious strategizing going on here- intense!
entertaining ourselves in Taj-MaTent while everyone else was sleeping!
someon got in trouble.....
watching the finale at the stadium of fire
one day before church w/our hairs curled
silly faces at our halloween family party
con's first day of preschool
right after we'd finished running through the sprinklers. that was a sweet moment.
Preston's carny
jaunt up to bridal veil on a sunday afternoon
AF days
4th of july parade!!! rise and shine!
going to meet Evan
just my sweet Conli
birthday girl
valentine's cookies!!!!
swimming- one of our loves
summerfest!
my girly- when she was my only girly- one month before sawyer got here!
Con's blessing day
Conli a week old....sweetness
our family, Dec 2009
the girls
Soy's favorite establishment- the Cheese
my littlest girly
Easter
funnies
first sledding experience- her no likey
chubalufagus
halloween!!!
music to my soul
where's Jess????
maybe we like raw cinnamon rolls???? Big Whoop!!!
friends halloween party 2008
dance dance with your pants off----what max and i used to do every daywhen he got home from school!!!
rodeo!!!
